You and Your Changing Family

No matter what kind of family you have, it's changing. Your baby is entering your family, not the other way around.

What happens when there is a new baby?

• Babies need a lot of time, attention and love.
• It is very normal for family members to feel jealous of the baby.
• Save time just for yourself, your partner, and other family members.

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• Spend some time with the other children without the new baby.
• Talk often about your feelings and about the new changes: The time needed to care for the baby...being tired...having less freedom...missing work...costs you hadn't planned for...less money for you. Every new parent has these concerns.

Involve your whole family in caring for the baby

• This is one way to make time for oneself.
• Everyone in the family can help with the baby.
• When young brothers and sisters help with the baby, they need to be watched closely.

Feelings about your baby

• When it has been a bad day, you are tired, and your baby won't stop crying, you may feel frustrated and angry. These feelings are normal.
• Remember that crying is the only way your baby can tell you his feelings and needs. You will not always be able to stop the baby from crying.
• Do not shake, spank or hit your baby.

Things to do for yourself when you have these angry and/or frustrated feelings:

• Do not try to be a super-parent!
• Talk to someone about your feelings - friends, family, doctor or public health nurse.
• Do something good for yourself. Ask someone to care for the baby while you take a walk, just sit down and relax, or take a bath.
• If you become very upset when your baby cries, put him in his crib or another safe place, leave the room, and shut the door. Check on your baby about every 10 minutes. If possible, ask someone else to help you with the baby. Call a friend to talk to and try to do something relaxing.

If you need help: See RESOURCES FOR HELP list under Family Support Groups & Information.